Contentment

The subject of contentment is something very close to my heart. It is something that I have struggled with for a long time. You see, I have this BIG problem, and it's called WORRY. I worry about literally everything. All. The. Time.

I can honestly say that some of that worry comes from my desire to be "perfect" in all things. I totally fit the profile for the "Perfectionist" personality. And you know what this striving for "perfection" has left me with? That's right...worries.

I worry that I will get sick (or worse) on a daily basis. Because, if I get sick, then who will do the laundry, cook, clean, take care of the kids? In my right mind, I know that my husband will help, he always does. But still, the worry is there. I worry that one of my kids will get sick (or worse). I worry that my house won't be "clean enough." This is partly to blame on my parents. While they are absolutely wonderful, they instilled in me this standard of cleanliness and order that I can't get out of my mind. I worry about not meeting other people's standards, whether it be in ministry or parenting, etc. (There's that whole "perfectionism" thing again.) I worry about all the "What If's" in life.

I worry so much, that sometimes after mulling over something over and over again, I will lose my train of thought...and then I worry about not remembering what I was worrying about. Are you still following me here? I told you it was bad...

But, several years ago I read this book called "Calm My Anxious Heart" by Linda Dillow. She is an amazing author and I have read almost all her books. This book in particular feels like it was written especially for me. In the first few chapters, Dillow adresses not the issue of WORRY, but rather the issue of CONTENTMENT.

I have to admit that I hadn't associated those two things together before. But as I read the first chapter this is what I highlighted...

A Prescription for Contentment:
*Never allow yourself to complain about anything--not even the weather.
*Never picture yourself in any other circumstances or someplace else.
*Never compare your lot with another's.
*Never allow yourself to wish this or that had been otherwise.
*Never dwell on tomorrow--remember that [tomorrow] is God's, not ours.

The author goes on to talk about the "secret to contentment." It's found in God's Word. "I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength." -Philippians 4:11-13

That means that I CAN be content no matter what life throws at me. In any situation, and at all times, God can give me strength to handle it. J. I. Packer says this, "Contenment is essentially a matter of accepting from God's hand what He sends because we know that He is good and therefore it is good."

As I realized how much this worry was connected to contentment, God started showing me other things in my life. I wasn't content. There was always something more that I wanted. When I was single, I wanted to be married. When I was married, I wanted to have a baby. When I had a baby, I wanted a house. You see...there's always something else that I "don't have." I think that when I stopped focusing on what I didn't have that I thought I should, I was able to release a lot of my worry. Don't get me wrong, it is still something I struggle with every single day. But, I can go back to those verses and realize that no matter what I have or don't have, no matter what season of life I am in, God will give me the strength to handle it.

Linda Dillow says it this way, "Our thought life--not our circumstances--determines whether we are content." It's not about where I am or what I have. The important thing is where I'm focused. And my focus is on Christ.